Thursday, January 24, 2008

No apologies

I'm seeing a trend in blogging lately, that disturbs me greatly. We bloggers, (women bloggers exclusively, it seems) are apologizing for things that require no apology. Why is this happening? I am seeing apologies for mussed hair, dark circles under eyes, crooked stitches, slightly imperfect photographs, messy studios, slow posting, unfinished projects...

I made most of the above jacket a few years ago (this photo was taken while it was in progress), when I thought I was going to love purple forever. Now, I REALLY hate it, but the fabric was quite expensive, so I hold on to it, thinking maybe someday... well...let's get real... This will likely remain in my nearly completed stash until I can transform it into something I will like for a long time. Who knows how long that will be... a poorly conceived project... sometimes that happens... even when you're $250 into materials for the project. Yeah, oh well.

I see many very professional, well-produced blogs as well... which are great -- don't get me wrong... But we all know how much time a person needs to dedicate to create a "perfect" post, with great photographs, masquerading as something casually dashed-off while sipping your morning coffee.

Isn't the beauty of life in its imperfection? Isn't life messy and unpredictable? Let's celebrate that. Isn't the person you love the most absolutely breath-taking when he/she first wakes up in the morning? Isn't your favorite sweatshirt threadbare in just the "right" places?

Isn't that what life is all about?

In this high-tech, highly-polished environment, super-glossy and over-produced, don't we all read blogs to engage and indulge our inner voyeur with real people leading real lives? People to whom we can relate? Really, who would trade their mother's famous chili (or insert your loved one's specialty here...) over the finest restaurant meal money can buy?


  1. I really hear you on the apology front! Of all the things to apologise about in this world, mussed hair is not high on the list, for me.
    But I must admit, I am a sucker for the beautifully produced blogs. To my mind there's room for both. Sometimes it's all about Mom's chilli, sometimes fine dining is where it's at. And in fairness to "oh, this old thing" brigade, I do think that an amazing camera in a photogenic, airy, tidy house does speed up the process quite a lot. Those of us who cram ourselves into little damp flats with a cheap point-and-shoot camera have a lot more stage managing to do...

  2. Anonymous9:11 PM

    Your blog has a great observation about apologizing for blogs that are less than perfect. It is important that the blogger is capable of expressing that feelings and thoughts, and physical appearance serve as the back drop. I actually like when someone post their less than perfect knitting or sewing project. Just for the record my apartment is not neat, and I am okay with that. As you said something life is a little messy.

  3. Anonymous9:13 PM

    I read your blog and agree about apologizing for things that happen in our lives. I like seeing projects that took a wrong turn, it reminds that not all of my projects were successful, but it is all a part of the learning experience.

  4. Yeah, I've been guilty of that, sorry. (joke)

    Just read your truthful insight and it made me smile. And then suddenly wonder if I'd done the same recently and probably have from time to time (generally about the quality of a photo because I felt it didn't do the original scene justice).

    Thanks for bringing this up. It reminds me why I decided to blog in the first place. Also, how our perceptions of our own style can change ever so slightly when we acknowledge that there's an invisible audience out there who are capable of absorbing and judging our words and pictures. It's for the fun of sharing our creative encounters, but also for our own enjoyment and journalling experience. So good question - why are we apologising for our own style, photos and unfinished projects? It's part of the process to have these imperfections.

    Maybe there's a little bit too much of the self-inflicted pressure being put upon ourselves. Now I am most certainly guilty of doing that! But it does keep me going and that's a good thing.

  5. Well, I have just been guilty of said offence on my blog, so maybe you are referring to me.
    Funny (not) thing is, some French readers who didn't read the English text commented on how bad I was looking. Well, not bad, but certainly worse for wear.

    It was precisely to forestall this kind of comment that I explained why I was looking like this. I didn't have the time to translate my post in French - and it didn't miss: people who didn't read English were quick to comment on my tired look.

    Either case, you are right in one respect. My blog is mine and I refuse to apologize for what I write in it - as long of course as what I write is about myself. :)

  6. Haha! Isabelle, you were actually one of the people who inspired that post! I saw your photo in that adorable top and saw absolutely nothing wrong, and thought "Why is she apologizing?"