The 4AM cry...

Whenever I get into conversations with other self-employed artist types, we discusss agonizing over projects, working so hard to force materials to conform to our vision, thinking and working so hard we can barely see or stand, and pulling all-nighters just to allow our minds and bodies to rest. That often brings up the subject of the the universal 4AM "cry".

And, without fail, I get a wide-eyed response of "You too???" This seems to be something almost all of us have in common. That soul-wrenching, supposedly private cry you have when you decide that you are a hack, a failure, talentless... untill you breathe life into the project, and, for better or worse, it starts to "become".

I think the creative process is very much like giving birth, and when it works, the glorious, euphoric high it produces is better than almost any feeling you could ever have. But the road is painful, sometimes long, and extremely emotional.

So, if you know this experience, at your next 4AM cry, know that you are not alone. If you are stuck, you can get "unstuck", if you are blocked, you can clear it, and you can (you will, and you must) overcome it. This is part of the process. If it is 4AM for you right now, I won't tell you to go to bed, because I know even I wouldn't take my own advice on that one!




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Cry...

This photo is from a great Alvin Ailey Dance, entitled "Cry". This dance was first performed in 1971, and was choreographed as a tribute to Ailey's own mother, but dedicated to mothers everywhere. It makes you want to cry, just to watch it.

The dress is just fabulous! How that beatiful movement is captured in the skirt is just magical.

I am on day three of nurse-duty for my sick six-year-old. Last night, after giving her a spongebath at 2AM, and changing all of her bedding after this most recent round of unpleasantness, I am truly tired. I we didn't get back to sleep until after 4AM. BOTH of my children woke up, bright and shiny, at 7AM today. I have decided that there will be a mandatory nap for all of us today.

Many of us high-energy, try to do-it-all types have hit that wall before... precipitating that 4AM weepy feeling, haven't we?

A Wall street Journal blogger asks "Can you relate to Clinton's tears?"

Sure. Not a sign of weakness... tears just come so easily when you're exhausted.